I have heard the word cancer for a whole week without stopping. I was so afraid of it. I didn’t realize that until now. My Mommy died from cancer and I saw her being consumed for more than two years until it was the last battle. I have heard before many stories about cancer from friends, acquaintances, and family members; painful stories with brave battles, and heroic doings. We know that we all are in the pool of the cancer dice to be the chosen ones, but when you see your Mommy full of energy, full of dreams, full of love fade away, is like your body is mysteriously invaded with some form of metal heaviness that contract your being and don’t let you breath, exhale, sigh…You know there is an unstoppable sentence and your fear keeps growing and growing until you are paralyzed.
The last four months were like when you see a tree being chopped and all the bark and sticks are being spilled around, you can see the layers of wood losing their life when their sap dries. The tree was our family, a part of all of us die with her. Days before the ending I went to the beach and for some incredible coincidence her name was written in the sand with a red rose laying there, and the waves were taking it away… She was the rock, the queen, the bear of our family, like in the movie Brave, and I have always been like Merida… a Tomboy.
The last time I saw her, she gave me a bike. A regular race green bike. She told me I was going to need it because I was going to use it in the campus…Today, I am in California, the bike is in Washington, and for ten years I only used it for occasionally errands to the beach or to the park. Now I have a pink bike with a basket, very appropriate for the city I live… But, in a turn of events my bike is going to be one for a triathlon, because my campus now is everywhere! I am speed thirsty and it is the natural outcome for a tomboy like me. If my Mommy could see me now she would be very proud of me as always I know she was ♥
Very close friends have been battling cancer every single second, every single breath. I see them everyday with such a fortitude and practical aproach to life, that everthing seems easy and light. The simple happiness of being alive another day with a sweet smile fill the entire room. Behind that, there is a pitched battle that gets invisible for the sake of work. Yes, they are my heros! To have the composure every single morning step means that their courage is endless. They have taught me how fortunate we are to see another new dawn even with the worst throw of the dice… The one with the words CANCER marked in every single face of the dice… Now, you say it again!! Cancer, cancer, cancer… maybe there is people who thinks that way you are going to overcome the terrifying fear of a sickness not to be named, or say it in whispers, or think is a curse… When many know is another outcome of the circle of life, that eventually we are going to void from our lives forever… The statistics show a positive trend on that. Mankind can win the war, how? Studing the enemy in every form, even in the probability of being positive or negative in the clinical tests and all their combinations… A tough word to say if you really know what does it mean…